


Don't Go

by calie15



Category: Agents of S.H.I.E.L.D. (TV), Captain America (Movies), Marvel Cinematic Universe
Genre: Angst, Developing Relationship, Emotional Hurt/Comfort, F/M, First Kiss
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-05-25
Updated: 2016-05-25
Packaged: 2018-06-10 17:13:41
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,076
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/6965962
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/calie15/pseuds/calie15
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Jemma makes the best decision she can and decides to leave, becauae having feelings for Bucky is to hard.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Don't Go

She won't cry. Jemma won't.

She tells herself she's strong, but she knows she's not. If she'd been strong then she would have stayed, or better yet, said something.

As it was she was hightailing it from an opportunity if a life time over a man that wasn't available. 

It wasn't her plan to fall for Bucky, yet there she was. She wasn't even sure what happened honestly. But somehow she's fallen for him regardless of how quiet he was, his haunted eyes, and dark past. She had appreciated the moments he gave her, even if their conversations were slightly stunted. Jemma liked it that she'd gotten to see a small smile that was so rare.

She liked his small shows of concern for her. Whether it be because she had insufficient sleep or that she was working to hard. The fact that he cared made her like him more.

It felt a bit like deserting him, but her heart couldn't take it any longer.

Jemma had given her resignation and was returning to SHIELD.

Now she sat in her bed, face in her pillow, crying.  
\---------

Three days later there a knock at her door, and she answers it with her hair tied up messily and wearing a pair of comfortable shorts and t-shirt. On the other side is Bucky. "Hi," she says softly.

Bucky looks at her and angeles his body to shoulder his way in. Jemma stumbles back, not because he pushed her, but more out of surprise. He walks in to the middle of the room and looks around at the boxes. The he turns.

"You weren't going to tell me," he said.

"I hadn't had a chance," Jemma lies. He frowns and looks away, staring at a box, and she can tell in the silence there are a lot of things going through his head.

Then Bucky looks at her again. "You're lying. You wouldn't have made this decision without thinking about it for weeks. You've knows the entire time."

That Jemma couldn't deny, and she looked away with guilt. "I'm sorry, it was complicated."

"Why? You wanted to be here, you're wanted here. There is nothing calling you back." He stepped forward and turned a hard glare on her. "So why?"

Jemma could tell him the truth, but she knew she really couldn't burden him with that. She only stared up at him. His eyes hardened and his jaw clenched and then he walked passed her to the door.

"Bucky," she started and grabbed his arm, but he turned sharply on her and yanked it away. "I'm sorry," she gasped and took a startled step back.

"What?" He snapped.

Jemma stared, aghast for a moment, bot understanding his anger. "You're upset with me." He only stared at her. "Why?"

"It's complicated," he shot back, repeating her words.

No, it was cruel. Life was cruel. As if it wasn't enough that she was pining after an unavailable man, now he was angry with her. "I suppose I deserve that," Jemma responded in a reserved tone. "Bucky, I wish I could explain, but it's more then just complicated. It's...difficult and...it just hurts," she admitted and hoped to see some kind of understanding on his face, but there was none.

"Yea, well, I guess I was an idiot to think you were different."

Jemma didn't like this side of him at all. He was guarded and angry, and when that came from Bucky, with his large build and rough exterior, it was somewhat intimidating. "I don't understand," she whispered, her vision blurring with the onset of tears. 

"You couldn't even tell me, you can't even tell me why. And now you want to be upset?!" He exclaimed. Then he drew in a deep breath as if trying to get back some of his control. "I won't make this mistake again," Bucky said flatly.

Jemma watched in fear as he turned again. He was going to walk away from her and she knew it would be permanent. "It's you," Jemma blurted out. "I'm leaving because of you."

He turned again and looked at her in a way she couldn't describe, maybe surprise, hurt, fury, all of the above. 

"I thought it best for both of us. I'm a horribly emotional person," Jemma admitted, "and you already have enough to contend with. It really didn't seem fair to burden you with my feelings, but it was just too hard being friends. I should have tried harder to keep it professional, but... I just," Jemma drew in a shaky breath and wiped her eyes with her fingers, "I like you more then I should and I didn't want to trouble you with that." He only stared at her. Jemma felt her cheeks flush with embarrassment and all she wanted to do was hide and cry. "I'm sorry, I-" she had started as she turned away to find something to wipe her tears away, but a hand wrapped around her elbow, tugging her back, and when she turned Bucky was in front of her and lifting his hand to slide into her hair and bringing his head down.

Jemma made a soft sound of shock as his lips touched hers, but then he really kissed her, lips moving and his arm going around her waist to pull her against him. He didn't kiss her hard and didn't deepen it, but his arm was tight around her and she wanted to melt into his hard warmth.

When Bucky pulled away he pressed his forehead against hers. "I want you to stay," he revealed.

Jemma stared up at him. "You do?" She asked and blinked, sending new tears spilling onto her cheeks.

"You're killing me," he whispered and brought both hands to cup her face, one cold and one warm, and brushed her tears away with his thumbs. "I'm sorry, for how I acted. I was upset. I shouldn't have talked to you like that."

Jemma shook her head at his apology, dismissing it. "It's fine. I should have told you." Then he was kissing her again, and this time his tongue parting her lips gently. "You really want me to stay?" She asked breathlessly against his lips.

Blue eyes stared down on her. "Yes."

Jemma wound her arms around his neck and allowed herself to let go of all her concerns and enjoy the feel of him holding her, his body against her, arms holding her tight.


End file.
